Marriage

Dear Husband.. This is What I Really Want For Mother’s Day!

Let me start by saying I love my family. I love being the one that takes care of them and the one who (in my mind) holds the household together. I LOVE it! But.. there are days every so often that I just want to be left the hell alone! (I mean this in the nicest way possible). I don’t want to be asked a million questions that start with saying “Mommy” five times in a row before I even have the chance to answer, or “Hey, what’s for lunch?” I dunno, Hun. Your guess is as good as mine. I want to say it one more time. 

I LOVE MY FAMILY!

But this is what I actually want for Mother’s day.

I want to sleep PAST 8 A.M

It’s Sunday and I go to a church that doesn’t start until 11:30 (Praise Jesus) I want to be the one that gets to sleep in this time while you gets the kids ready by yourself. And no, not just stay in bed while it happens. I want to stay ASLEEP! I don’t want to be asked what the kids need to wear or how to style their hair. And I really want some common sense to be used while getting them dressed so that I don’t have to re-dress them to look publicly acceptable when I do wake up. 

Breakfast in bed

I’m a simple gal. Drive through Whataburger is fine with me! Breakfast on a bun, here I come! And maybe paired with some Starbucks.. Iced caramel macchiato, please!

I want to go to brunch and have a “mommy drink”

Not Chili’s, or Denny’s. I want to go to a cute little restaurant with over priced parfaits and have a few mimosas. Then maybe a few more!

To be off of diaper duty!

For the love of all that is Holy, PLEASE do not come to me and tell me that one of the kids has a dirty diaper. Yes, thank you for helping out with diapers on other days, but today I don’t even want to be informed about what’s going on down there. 

Someone else plan dinner

I also DO NOT want to be asked “What’s for dinner?” Who know’s? Definitely not me. Anything that goes with orange juice and champagne is fine with me! Or even better.. take me to dinner! One where I don’t have to take anyone to the bathroom a thousand times just because they’re getting bored with sitting at the table and also one where I don’t have to feed our baby that is in that glorious stage of throwing everything that comes near him. I want a steak and to be able to eat that steak within the same time frame that it gets put in front of me. 

I want a homemade card that I can keep forever

I want something cute and original that only my babies could have made for me. I want to hug them and laugh while they tell me all about it.

I also want a bottle of wine that’s already been opened because you already poured me a glass. Ahhhh… now that’s special. 

Something shiny!

Please.. nothing that says “MOM” on it. Being around me for a few minutes people will know my name is Mom. I really don’t need a name tag. Anything else is perfectly acceptable as long as it sparkles! (and not with glitter)

I want a present that’s for me!

I don’t need another household appliance! Even one that I’ve been talking about for the past 6 months. Save that one for a day you need some brownie points, but not today! I want something special that’s just for me!

If you’re thinking about a coupon book, I don’t need any “back rubs” because they will eventually turn into something for you, and kisses are always free. Some guilt free “Leave me the hell alone” or “This is now Daddy’s problem” coupons would be great. Oh and no expiration date on those either.


Happy Mother’s Day, Yall!

 

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